And then one day, I found out I could cry.

 

It wasn’t what I wanted, what I longed for so badly I couldn’t breathe some nights as I lay there clutching my blanket, wishing with all my heart as I stared at the black, blank ceiling. I wanted the sunshine, I wanted it inside me, to fill that airless hollow among my ribs where all my feelings had been roughly scooped out by everything we’d been through.

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